Dangerous Words (or Lack Thereof) in a Marriage

Marriage counselors and divorce attorneys tip off about about dangerous statements (or lack of same) in a marriage which could signal the beginning of the end of a marriage. They aren’t constructive, hurt the other’s feelings and may fuel anger and resentment.

“You’re being ridiculous”.

Such dismissal of a spouse’s sharing of their feelings discourages open communication and damages the bond.

“I don’t care anymore”.

Well, if true, where can the couple go from there?

“You never” …

This kind of overgeneralization is in essence just an attack.

“If you hadn’t” …, “I wouldn’t have to yell at you”.

Again, this is simply casting blame.

           Resounding silence.  

Not communicating doesn’t fix anything.

“I want a divorce”.

Again, this doesn’t leave much room for retreat or course change.

“I don’t need to tell you where I went”.

Do you have something to hide?

“Why can’t you be more like” …. ?

Comparisons to third parties are just pointless.

“I wish I never met you”.


If you want to try to improve your marriage, healthier communication is key. If you and your spouse need some help to achieve this, a marriage therapist may be able to help.

Read more in this Huffington Post piece: If Your Spouse Says These 9 Things, Your Marriage May Be In Trouble .