Every year I get calls from soooo many people, who also called me the year before, and the year before that and, yes, the year before that – and sometimes for years before that.
They want a divorce. Still. Months and years later.
But they don’t move forward with their divorce.
They have reasons, of course. Lots of them. Ranging from the sublime to the almost ridiculous.
Sadly, most of those people will call me again next year. And the year after that. And the year after that.
Maybe until I retire. And then they’ll call another divorce attorney who hasn’t retired yet.
It’s really tragic that soooo many people imprison themselves in painfully unhappy, sometimes even abusive, marriages – indefinitely, if not permanently.
Because (nearly) anyone who truly wants a divorce can get one.
When you get right down to it, all it really takes is coming to a decision. To file, to get the process started.
It’s January of 2015. The dawn of a brand new year. Filled with promise and possibillity.
Almost everybody has just made, or is hip deep in the process of making, all kinds of decisions.
To lose weight. Eat healthy. Get fit. Earn more money. Find a new love interest. Heck, even to learn how to crochet.
We call those decisions New Year’s resolutions. They’re a time-honored tradition.
Of course, by themselves, those resolutions don’t “get the job done”. They are just a foundation or building block, but the most critical one.
Consider this oft-quoted wisdom (source unknown): “[t]he hardest part of any journey is taking that first step.”
And this keen insight from none other than Charles Atlas: “[s]tep by step and the thing is done.”
Reaching the decision to actually pursue that long longed-for divorce is indeed a meaningful, self-empowering first step.
And from there, it really is just continuing to put one foot in front of the other, taking one more small step after another – and then another.
Until the divorce is done. (Or, for that matter, any other “resolution”.)
To be continued …