Oklahoma has the third highest divorce rate in the country.

More than half of all marriages there go by the boards.

In 2007, the state had over 28,000 marriages – and almost 19,000 divorces.

A lot of divorces for a state of reportedly regular churchgoers.

The high rate of divorce in Oklahoma is blamed on widespread poverty, teen pregnancy and early marriages.

In an effort to curb divorce, a conservative state legislator has sponsored legislation to require counseling both prior to marriage and prior to divorce.

Some oppose the legislation as too intrusive.

Others feel the social benefits of the legislation justify the intrusion. For example, divorce and childbirth by singles costs US taxpayers $112 billion per year.

The proposed legislation also includes an option for covenant marriage, in which couples agree upfront to premarital counseling and to restrictions on their own right to divorce.

Read more in this Associated Press article: Okla. conservatives debate divorce legislation.

Mother and Father have Baby together.

Mother and Father split up.

Mother obtains injunction for protection against domestic violence from Father.

During Father’s timesharing with Baby, Baby becomes “unresponsive” and subsequently dies.

Mother believes Father is responsible for Baby’s death.

Case is still under investigation.

Father allegedly violates domestic violence restraining order, when he goes to memorial service for Baby.

Then Mother is stabbed to death.

Police suspect Father.

Father reportedly violates order of protection again during that incident.

Father has previously served fourteen years in prison.

The judge set Father’s bail at $1,000.

Read more in this [Tampa] WTSP TV 10 news article: Father of Laura Taft’s baby suspected in her murder and this [Tampa] Bay News 9 TV news article: Laura Taft murder suspect reportedly on suicide watch.

The reason?

Because, a now-suspended attorney and father says, there is no accountability.

To whom?

Not specified.

In his view, child support is, apparently, routinely diverted to:

• drug abuse
• gambling addiction
• “lawyer-generated controversies”
• partner support
• income destruction and
• father replacement agendas

And, in his opinion, the government’s mandating of the payment of child support to the custodial parent is unconstitutional governmental interference in childrearing, and slavery.

In his view, his child support obligations are satisfied by providing a home with play areas for his children during their timesharing with him.

His implied premise: his children’s support during the other parent’s timesharing, even if that is the vast majority of the time, is entirely the sole concern and responsibility of the other parent … unless, perhaps, there is accountability … presumably, to him.

Read more in this Utica Observer-Dispatch guest opinion: Child support is welfare because it lacks accountability.

In Kansas, severe child abuse is on the decline, reportedly largely because of years of “evidence-based prevention strategies” supported by years of generous government funding.

Evidence-based prevention measures include:

1. home-visitation by social workers to families at high risk of abandonment, abuse or neglect of children
2. parent support and
3. education and information on early childhood development

Although these strategies are expensive, they are reportedly seven times less expensive than addressing the abandonment, abuse and neglect of children that would result from not funding these initiatives.

The federal government expends over $100 billion each year due to mistreatment of children.

Home visitation professionals work closely with families in distress to educate parents, assist parents in arranging medical care and direct them to community resources that can help them.

In some ways, these professionals are modern surrogates for longstanding family and friends from whom families may be distanced in our mobile society.

Read more in this Wichita [KS] Eagle article: Prevention effort saves kids, money.

Times are tough. Especially for those wishfully contemplating divorce.

Even more especially for those who are upside down in their homes and possibly facing foreclosure and/or overburdened by credit card debt.

For some, bankruptcy may be the best or only way not only to escape a bad marriage, but also to get their love lives and financial lives back on track, according to a bankruptcy attorney.

This strategy may work best where both spouses are on board with it and go through bankruptcy prior to final judgment in their divorce.

It is important to realize that bankruptcy cannot discharge alimony or child support obligations, past, present or future.

Also, the law has changed over the last several years, and debt may not be as freely dischargeable and marital property settlements may not be as easy to circumvent as in the past.

Still, consulting with a bankruptcy attorney knowledgeable of bankruptcy law as it applies to divorce and paternity-related issues just may make all the difference to those wishfully contemplating divorce but saddled with overwhelming debt.

Read more in this Bankrate website article: 5 money jams bankruptcy can fix.

Mother and Father divorce.

Father is awarded custody of Daughter.

Ninety percent of children abducted in California are the subject of a child custody dispute.

And so it was with eight year old Daughter, who went missing fourteen years ago.

Now twenty-two years old, Daughter has recently been found alive and well.

Mother has been arrested for kidnapping though.

This case stands out for its resolution so long after the abduction.

Only six percent of child abduction cases open more than six months are ever solved.

Mother and Daughter moved frequently throughout Daughter’s childhood after the abduction.

Daughter no longer lives with Mother.

Because Daughter is a legal adult, authorities will not provide Father with the name she goes by or her contact information.

Read more in this San Jose Mercury News article: Resurfacing of Walnut Creek girl highlights strains of parental abductions and this CBS Early Show news article: Girl Gone 14 Years Found Safe; Mom Charged.

What’s the relationship between premarital cohabitation and divorce?

Contrary to earlier research (based on smaller samplings), a new study suggests that there isn’t much of a relationship between cohabitation and divorce.

Interestingly, the variable that did have slight statistical significance was the degree of commitment between the cohabitors at the time of moving in together.

Specifically, couples who begin cohabiting prior to becoming engaged or otherwise commiting to future marriage with each other are more likely to divorce if they eventually marry.

On the other hand, couples who move in together only after becoming engaged or making some other mutual commitment to marry each other later have about the same odds of later divorcing as couples who did not cohabit prior to marriage.

This newer study is based on larger samplings, because these days two thirds of married couples live together before tying the knot.

The likelihood of divorce was determined based on a ten year window from the date of marriage.

Earlier studies suggested that cohabitation before marriage actually increased the odds of later divorce.

Read more in this USA Today article: Report: Cohabiting has little effect on marriage success and this New York Daily News article: Living together before marriage doesn’t significantly raise likelihood of divorce: study.

Husband is court-ordered to pay support. Child support or spousal support or both.

Husband gets laid off and his only income is from unemployment.

He cannot afford to pay his court-ordered support.

He stops paying entirely. Or pays what he can.

Leaving a large monthly deficiency.

In the current economy, getting a comparable job could take a while.

What should Husband do?

Well, too often Husband just continues to limp along, month after month, his back support obligation growing larger and larger by the month.

Naively thinking that his unemployment will excuse his nonpayment of support and get him off the hook.

Unfortunately for him, no such luck.

The only way Husband can contain the damage is to file for a modification of support. Immediately.

Read more in this Daily Breeze [LA] column: Ask the Lawyer.

People often ask “how long does a divorce take?”

What most people really mean is “how fast can my divorce go through?”

The answer to both questions can vary widely from case to case depending on many factors.

Many states impose a minimum waiting period before a divorce can go through to final judgment.

In Arizona, the current wait is sixty days – but some Arizonians think that’s too soon (ones who are not seeking a divorce).

And so a state legislator has introduced a bill to lengthen Arizona’s waiting period for a divorce to one hundred eighty days! Six months.

The same bill also increases mandatory divorce education, presumably on co-parenting after divorce.

A psychologist opposes the bill as forcing children to live in a hostile environment for longer.

The legislator reportedly will be amending the bill to create an exemption for victims of domestic violence though.

Florida’s waiting period is twenty days from the date of filing.

But, in practice, rarely are any but the simplest of uncontested divorces completed anywhere near that quickly.

Read more in this Arizona Republic article: Panel OKs bill to extend divorce waiting period.

Seemingly ordinary California family, if a bit large.

Six biological children.

Three children adopted from Africa.

Homeschooled.

Fundamentalist Christians.

The folks next door.

Until one of their children, 7 years old, dies of cardiac arrest.

And, it turns out, two of their other children have serious injuries and conditions, including kidney failure.

The dead girl mispronounced a word while reading her lesson aloud.

Parents are arrested on charges of murder, felony torture and misdemeanor cruelty to a child. In other words, child abuse.

Children are taken into protective custody by child welfare agency.

Parents have no prior arrests or child protective services investigations records.

Parents allegedly use a punishment device advocated by a well-known Christian fundamentalist couple holding themselves out as child-rearing experts.

Parents have retained separate counsel.

Read more in this Chico [CA] News Review article: Child-abuse case shines light on Paradise couple.